September 2010
129 posts
August 2010
55 posts
1 tag
My take on the movie Takers
I liked it even though it was a cliqued version of Ocean’s Eleven-Thirteen. Group loses a member to a mission. Member sent to jail. Said member comes back with a job. Job leads to a long story of things. Etc etc etc. I feel that the thing I hate most about the movie was T.I. being like Aizen from Bleach and Father from FMA in various parts of the movie (especially the end at one part). The...
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Day Ten: One confession.
I haven’t been showing love to the people that I should be showing love to. To my parents, to my homies, to my little sisters, to my ex…..i love all of y’all with all my heart. This is something I am doing in real life and slowly telling all of you how I feel. Some times I have made some progress in one aspect of life and regressed in another. I am glad to call you people I care...
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Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life...
=[
=)
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Day Eight: Three turn ons.
Bite my lip/neck/ear/etc
Bite your lip
Lick your lips
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Splurge vs Investment
I feel that as we progress in our lives we are always faced with two decisions: pleasure now or pleasure later. School, work, relationships, etc…..everything can fit these two things. For example, lets look at school
Pleasure now
You dress nice
Get looks from the opposite sex
Go to parties
Enjoyable social life
Poor academic life
Don’t go to big name schools
Go to schools you...
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Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Bad hygiene
Super clingy
No goals for the future
Sneaky
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Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order...
Dad
Gem
Janes
Troy
Khalil
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Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Join MC
Not try hard enough doing step
Had poor grades so that getting into the TLA major was impossible
Been so insecure with myself to not do the one thing I appear to be good at….speak
Not trying hard enough to stay in touch with you……
Try to be accepted by people that don’t give two shits about me and disowning the ones that did
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Bitch
Shocking title to have as a post but important nonetheless. I never call a girl a bitch…..that is like calling my mother or grandmama a bitch. Ultimate disrespect to a woman using that word…..but this word is used so casually among the female population it urks me. Similar to my sentiment about the word nigga…..i just hate those words. People use it and I just let it go but I...
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Chemistry
I feel that chemistry is very important to a relationship and friendship. The better our chemistry the better our bond will be. Some people that I didnt have strong chemistry with I didn’t have strong bonds with. I have ignored my gut feeling on people to try and be friends with a large number of people. To what avail I should have asked myself….
The problem is that I know if you are...
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My taste in the ladies
I think while I read this enlightening book (What I Wish I Knew When I Was 20) I figured out I enjoyed the complex type of woman. The one that has me thinking into the wee hours of the morning what’s on her mind. Most girls to me are simple….simple in the fact that mentally they are clear cut.
Either you like me or you don’t.
Either you show interest or you don’t
...
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The joys of hello
Remember when you meet someone for the first time and you say hi
Person A: Hi
Person B: Hey
Everybody forgets how you meet people….but the first time is always like magic. There are a few people that still recapture the magic whenever I see them. I say hi or they say hi to me…..makes me feel good inside. I don’t know its like a flush of positive emotions like we are meeting...
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Connection
I feel that I can connect to a large number of people rather easily. I have made some new friends/acquaintances through this site and it’s great. Just like Tom Hardy’s character said in Inception
“You mustn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.”
Now I always realize I can make friends but its hard to keep these friends. The connection I have made which...
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Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
You
School
My boys
Money
Clothes
Stress
Mistakes of the past
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My boys
Damon
Troy
Brian
Timothy
Stephan
Maurice
These are my boys from high school that I have reconnected with. Its not like we haven’t talked in years but I mean really connect with them. I have been going through some stuff the early part of my 3 month summer vacation. The fear I had is in the process of disappearing but first I needed to talk to some people. I made a list of people I...
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Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Good Listener. I value that because I talk a lot so one that listens is a great asset.
Good talker. Expression is always great in a relationship….give and take makes it better. You speak I listen
Mental Boner. I need to be attracted to you mentally….physical isnt that important if my mind is always flaccid. Please don’t be an empty shell or trophy wife type of girl. We will...
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Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
I am very particular in how I perform certain tasks. It is a sense of control for me so that I have something constant in my life
I enjoy talking to people and figuring them out. This is due to the influence of my dad and Gem on their analytical abilities on the same topic.
Making friends for me is easy. Keeping in touch with all of them is hard. I get overwhelmed sometimes its crazy
Gaining...
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Day 30- Who are you?
I am Howard Jr.
I am a son, brother, grandson, nephew, friend, best friend, student, philosopher, etc
People always ask who you are….I answer with the titles that make up myself. What makes me who I am is the things that I have done and the people I share it with. This connection I share with a small number of people make me…..me haha.
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Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten...
I miss our convos, I miss us traveling together, I miss us, I miss you…..I miss my best friend
I wish we were closer…..in years i have technically known you the longest but sadly know you the least
You are like my sister and I love you like one…..I just don’t feel it back sometimes
Big disappointment as a friend…..
Homie forever…..i’ll tell your kids...
This is the new challenge I'll be starting...
10 Day Countdown Challenge
Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
...
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Forgotten Homie
I remember in my younger years during elementary school, there was this boy named King. He lived down the block from me and was part of the triumvirate of powers that I shall name the St. Jays street homies. We all lived on the same street…..King, myself, and Desmond. Went to the same elementary and junior high school, so we stuck together for a while building a strong bond over time....
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Day 29- In this past month, what have you learned?
I have learned the important lesson of repression. You cannot hold back emotions in order to make others happy. Eventually, you will become exhausted and feel like you’re empty. I had to realize that I matter and put my needs over others. No one is gonna see you as important if you do not make yourself important. Everyone learns a lesson respective to their life to reach that next level. I...
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Day 28- A picture of you last year and now, how...
I look pretty much the same as I did last year (facial hair starting to come in). The difference is the mental aspect. Grades are better than last year and my self image is better than it was last year. I am realizing some things about myself that I overlooked a year ago. Now I just have to make sure I do what I set out to do and not just talk. I have something to prove and will do it will all...
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Criticism
I feel that I finally have a grasp of myself and I made a mistake in my previous analysis of myself. I am not selfish I just dont feel recognition or appreciation from people I deem important. This is where I hop from crew to crew, site to site to find something that can never be filled. I know I have said in past post that I want attention and at the same time dont want it. People dont face...
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Acceptance
Its funny when people think they know themselves but sadly they don’t. Growth doesn’t occur until you reach a pinnacle of acceptance and a strong desire for change. There are five steps as follows:
Denial – “I feel fine.”; “This can’t be happening, not to me.”
Denial is usually only a temporary defense for the individual. This feeling is generally...
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Day 27- Why are you doing this 30 day challenge?
This is my first challenge of many to come (I honestly have a word document of many more). Expression is something I have not done over the years so these challenges force me to think. Eventually, I have used this expression to figure out some things about myself. The purpose of blogging is to find yourself through writing about yourself or topics you enjoy. From now to the time I complete my last...
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Day 26- What you think about your friends?
The feeling I have towards my friends varies. At some points they are my backbone or crutch and in others they are like clouds in the sky…..unattainable. Mixed imagery of my friends is because of my refusal to truly express myself due to fear of scrutiny. I love my friends my than they can imagine but I just dont show it because at times I do not feel important to them. It could be...
Quick note I didnt skip Day 24 I made it a private...
I didn’t even know we had that option till today. Definitely going through the other blogs to fix that up
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Day 25- What I would find in your bag?
Charger
Headphones
Ipod
Extra Battery
Napkins
Books
Newspapers
Two water bottles
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I am getting there…..baby shower and you were there. Still find you attractive but I just know that I cannot keep thinking in the past.
Once the two truths were dished out I was set because
You do not love me anymore
I am not important to you anymore.
I get over it day after day…..it is whatever at this point
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Day 23- Something you crave for a lot.
Food…..all kinds of food minus eggs and fish
Girls……all shapes and sizes
Sex…..not surprising since im a guy
Attention
Recognition
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Day 22- What makes you different from everyone...
Different in terms of what should be the question. I feel that I have more empathy towards other people more than the average person. Something else is the fact that I can consciously realize my flaws in what I am doing. I care with all of my being….which is why the title of friend means a lot to me. Once I have that trust and loyalty, I will do whatever in my power to maintain it. I am an...
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Homie (best friend), friend, acquaintance
I had a real convo on the realization that a lot of people you meet in your lifespan will be acquaintances and associates. In my personal opinion, I have overused the term best friend, bro, sis, etc etc.
I sat down and made a list of people I consider my homies, my friends, and my acquaitances.
Homies
People that no matter what I feel like I can turn to with a problem at hand. No matter the...
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Day 21- A picture of something that makes you...
I cheated and created this collage (which is technically one pic) of all the things that make my smile. From old memories to new friends….within this collage is moments that make me smile. I couldn’t pick just one because they were all epic to me. Shows how selfish I am lol but this is my blog so I do what I please
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Highs and Lows
Why do I start my day great and end it bad. Why do I start my day bad and end it good.
No consistency in my life anymore and its crushing my spirits at times. I can be out and about in the city or emo in my own house. Its truly depressing……or am I depressed…..
Am I the problem?????…….I always put the blame on someone else
Relationship fails…..it was her fault...
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Day 20- Someone you see yourself marrying/being...
This is kinda hard to answer….because I have to choose one person to envision myself marrying. I can see myself with Angela Simmons. Why Angela Simmons?? Idk something about her screams I can see you next to me for a long time. Maybe its her newfound cakes or maybe it is due to the fact that she is Rev. Run’s daughter. I dont know……I just know that I like her and she...
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Day 19- Nicknames you have; why do you have them?
Howie - First nickname for obvious reasons -______-
Skippy/Skip - JHS nickname cuz of a dare……changed it to Skip for HS and beyond
Govern’a/Stonewall/Southern Slang - Names I got from the step for three funny stories
Govern’a - glasses broke so I used one lens for the rest of the day looking like an englishman (monocle)
Stonewall - Trashed talk the Knicks about losing by 55 points and walk...
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Day 18- Plans/dreams/goals you have.
I have a few plans that are ongoing….let’s list them
Plans
Workout more to gain some weight throughout the semester
Maintain a 3.3 GPA till I graduate college or higher
Overcome myself (to complicated to explain)
Blog till I don’t need it anymore
Dreams
Be a better son, friend, colleague
Goals
Get a job with a bank (Chase or Bank Of America preferred)
Exit college...
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Friends
When you start school, you are immersed into a new setting which is filled with people of different backgrounds. You start to form bonds or friends.
Now as we grow older these bonds become vital to shaping our character. The sad thing is when old bonds break and cannot be recovered. Daycare friends all the way to college or work, some friends enter and exit our lives in a flash. I don’t...
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“Even if you had a relationship with someone or let’s say especially if you have...”
– Wale - The Friends N Strangers
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Day 17- Someone you would want to switch lives...
Trey Songz is the first person that comes to mind for a person I would switch lives with for one day. Every dude has a role model musically, athletically, politically, etc. For music, my role model is Trey Songz. Ever since I listen to his first single Gotta Make It, I had a feeling he was gonna be big one day. Now with the mixtape Anticipation and the album Ready; his image, swag, and ego are...
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Day 16- Another picture of yourself.
Sometimes I amaze myself with how I can take ridiculous pictures of myself. Just playing around with photo booth is a joy to me. Might even start a 365 project as some point…….or not because I am lazy
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Narcissism
I just realized something after a convo…..I really don’t give a fuck about anybody. Like legit…..not one fuck is given about anyone. You who is reading this….YEA YOU TOO. I know now I do things to convenience myself.
I pick friends for my benefit alone.
I drop friends for my benefit alone.
I am nice for my benefit alone.
Pay attention to the pattern…..I do...
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Day 15- Put your iPod on shuffle: First 10 songs...
RZA - Try Ya Ya Ya
Jay-Z - 44 4’s
Ghetto Boys - G Code
T.I. - Help Is Coming
Lil Wayne - Sweet Dreams (feat Nicki Minaj)
KiD CuDi - Day N Nite
Musiq Soulchild - Halfcrazy (Remix)
Nelly - Stepped On My J’z
Mase - 24 Hours To Live (feat. The Lox, DMX, Black Rob)
T.I. - You Know What It Is (feat Wyclef Jean)
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Day 14- A picture of you and your family.
It is shocking that I have no pictures with my actual family. None with my cousins, parents, etc. Just a bunch of pictures of friends in big clusters. To not make this a waste of a day, I have two pics (one of the close band of brothas and the other the step team at my school). We are all doing our own thing at the moment but we are still a “family” and thats why I posted these...
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Nagging Emotions
Honestly Marcus and Oscar got me at a bad time last night lol. They did…..the song was on the dashboard and it ruined my whole night. Everyone expects that as a man, I must be emotionless, strong, and rigid. My makeup isn’t really like the typical male imagery. I have always been around women when I was growing up so I actually listen to my emotions. Problem is that when I feel like I...
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Day 13- A letter to someone who has hurt you...
Dear _____,
Listen to Trey Songz - Can’t Be Friends…….that’s is how I truly feel. Nothing more to say that hasn’t been said
Yours Truly,
Skip
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-______-
I have not title for this post for the simple reason that is my current facial expression. So no more of this double major talk…..my school shat on my plans…….
New plan. Still do economics but sneak in some extra psychology courses on these motherfuckers…..they can’t stop me. I will just have to do things my way. That being said it is still time for me to be serious....
